Closet Trolls

My friend, Hobbes, educated me about the important issue that is ruining the lives of people all over the world and has asked that I pass on this very important public service announcement. Please, read this and act accordingly. Your lives will be forever changed.

Good luck.

Everyone, at some time in their life, has lost something in the midst of the jungle masses that once resembled a bedroom and blamed it on faeries, sprites, the monsters under the bed, and especially closet trolls. Yet little is known of these mystical creatures we all believe in so firmly as children. Why do these beings inhabiting the dark recesses of bedrooms and closets disappear as people grow up? It's because adults have boring closets. No closet troll would be interested in textbooks or mothballs.

As children grow older, they are less inclined to believe in such things as faerie creatures. It has long been accepted that belief fades because it is a childish thing, meant to be put off as children grow to adults. This theory, however, leaves no explanation for what happens to the toys and whatnots constantly disappearing from closets and bedrooms.

When we keep in mind that correlation is not causation, another possibility opens for consideration. As children become adults, their belongings become far less interesting. There are therefore far fewer things to tempt the closet trolls and they appear less and less frequently. Eventually they come so infrequently that there is no longer any reason to believe the mischievous creatures ever existed.

Test it. Put a box of Pick Up Stix in your closet and see how long it lasts.

Thank you, friend. Thank you. You've changed the lives of millions.